Can we be lovers and friends?

I am a firm believer that every person comes into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I've met plenty of reasons, a few seasons and even fewer lifetimes. We always want to meet that person that is our lifetime love...but myself like Whitney often asks, HOW WILL I KNOW? I have a homegirl who is the queen of the rebuttal "sounds good." So, when some dude or chick is selling you swamp land in Florida, it probably sounds good until you realize you can't build on it.

A friend and I were talking recently and I told them "I'm scared that the person I envision either doesn't exist or I'll be so burnt out by the time they come along, that I don't recognize it and miss a blessing." I went on to say "If I were to be with someone it would have to be a kindred spirit, that didn't feel like work, but knew me well enough to understand the things I didn't say. #wheretheydothatat?" My friend expressed that they totally understood my thought process, but how many people are walking around doing the same thing, simply being afraid after being hurt many times over? My friends always tell me "When you're ready" What the hell does that mean? In my mind I've been ready, I just never attract EXACTLY or even close to what I'm looking for. I really want to fall in love, not stupid... or fall in lust.

I had a friend express an interest, that I would never have been brave enough to explore, so I applaud that person. TOTALLY. But why are we both scared. And as a friend, I totally trust the person, but I'm a little leery at anything beyond a platonic relationship. Why do we take ourselves through these changes? I expressed to my friend that I have a real problem with the concept of "relationships." Because of course you and your mate define what YOUR relationship is, but it's so easy to fall into the rut or routine of what a "relationship" is supposed to look like. I personally would like mine to look like what Jay and Beyonce's look like their relationship is like. We'll never know because we're not them, but they seem to be very good friends who enjoy each other's company. I am feeling that. When you have someone who loves and respects you for being you, you can save all of the bull, but you also run the risk of losing a great friend...According to my own words I'd rather have a GREAT friend than a "boyfriend"/"husband." Hmmm...Can we be lovers and friends?